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Showing posts with label Testing Times. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Testing Times. Show all posts
Make Time. Read Blog.
// By Jonathan


I once did something very silly. I told someone to start a blog. Now, I admit that the silliness of this move may not be immediately apparent, so let me explain. There is only so much time left in the world. I don't know how much time exactly - my Cub Scouts handbook was particularly vague on this subject - but I imagine it to be somewhere between 16 hours and 2 million years. As a result we only have so much time to do things. Like brush our teeth. Ignore 'reality' television. And read blogs. This blog. By recommending someone else starts a blog gives them a piece of the world's time; and thus gives you less time to read my blog. Sorry about that. It was a badly thought out move. The good news is, though, that I have learnt from that mistake. I won't be telling anyone else to start a blog.

So when Marc asked me whether I would like to collaborate with him on a new blog, I naturally said 'No'. The problem was that Marc was not in earshot and so all he got was an email saying 'Yes'. Taking things at face-value, Marc decided I really meant 'Yes'. As a result we have created 7 Reasons. A bit like Ronseal, it does exactly what it says on the tin. Makes the dull shiny. Everyday we'll be taking a look at topical topics or random randomness and giving you seven reasons, erm, why. For example, 7 Reasons Why France Like Their Onions. Basically, think of it as a self-help guide.

And it all starts over here. Tomorrow. Just remember that this is your first love, okay? Thanks.
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// By Jonathan

I don't know if you have ever been ambushed on the way out of Waterstones before, but if you haven't, let me tell you now, it's an odd feeling. Outside Sainsburys, fair enough, but Waterstones? It just shouldn't happen. I had just been in to see Andrew Strauss - he called me dude - when a man attacked me from the right. Being slightly cynical of anyone who attacks me on the street, my natural reaction was that this man was a chugger. But as I tried to walk away, he followed me. Assuming he was trying to ask me what hair product I used, I turned towards him. He then said something about 'press' and 'quick interview'. My ears pricked up. The above video is the result.


The bizarre thing is that it lasts only 20 seconds. While it was happening I could have sworn it was lasting a lifetime. I could also have sworn I said 'brilliant' every other word instead of just twice, and finally, I was pretty sure I spent most of my time looking away from the camera. I am more than happy to see that I was just being paranoid. Mostly. Unfortunately, it's not all good news. In years to come I will be haunted by two things. My strange jaw movements and sudden head jerking is one. My gingerness is the other. The first I can probably work on, the second needs some serious man management. As a result, I have decided to start shaving every hour for the rest of my life and not letting my hair grown longer than 10mm. (That's the hair on my head obviously - the hair on my chin doesn't grow one centimetre every hour. That would be ridiculous).

And two things about what I actually said. When I said Andrew Strauss wasn't a natural leader, I actually meant natural captain. There is a major difference. Sorry about that dude. And when I said egos, that wasn't a cheap shot at KP. I was, rather inarticulately I admit, trying to suggest that to be a captain, you have to understand what makes everyone tick and not just expect them to go your way - 'The KP Way' as it was when he was capitano. Something the dude Straussy seems to have done very well. I should probably have just said that, shouldn't I?
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